Pre-Half-Marathon Training & Nutrition Update

Training
I still have a lot to learn about heart rate training. I've been working with it since August, though, so here are some observations I've made at this point. I'd love to have those others of you who are using this method to tell me if you've noticed anything similar.

1. Long slow runs appear to have a pretty quick effect on my ability to run faster at my "easy" heart rate. On October 6, I executed an extremely slow one-hour-forty-five minute run. I thought that thing was never going to end, as I was under orders to stay below 150 beats-per-minute the whole time and seriously felt like I was running underwater at some points. But on my next mid-week semi-long run (an hour run last Wednesday) my paces at sub-150 bpm were ten to twenty seconds faster per minute than I saw on the long one just four days before. Though I was still slow, I never had that "Geez, I'm really crawling" sensation--even on some pretty long climbs.

Also, slow runs at higher altitudes (even the 500-foot difference between my town (Longmont) and Boulder) and/or on steep trails seem to have the same happy effect a few days later. I'm going to try to do my last run before I leave for Detroit at a slightly higher and/or steeper location for this reason.

2. Maintaining my "sustained" (speed workout) heart rate is *hard.* On Friday, I did a tempo/sustained workout that consisted of a 15-minute tempo section followed by four 2 1/2 minute speed sections. I nailed the tempo section with no problem (staying between 164 and 168 bpm the whole time), and I managed to nail the first 2 1/2 minute interval too (range for these was supposed to be 170-175 bpm). But on the next three I couldn't get the heart rate to stay in that range. True, the middle two were slower than the first one (which I think means I was being a drag-ass and not running fast enough), but the last one was at a pace ten seconds per mile faster than the first--yet the average heart rate was only in the high 160s. Not sure what's up with that.....Anyway, I know I still need to work on toughing it out at those higher speeds. It's amazing how long 2 1/2 minutes can seem!

3. Pace is much less of a big deal to me now. I do look at it, but only in retrospect. Thus, I'm really not sure what to run next Sunday. Darren wants to look at my speeds and comfort level on one last "sustained" workout this coming Tuesday (four four-minute intervals at 164-168 bpm). If I'm able to stay comfortable and controlled during all four intevals, he says, I will have identified my pace for the Detroit Half-Marathon this Sunday (keeping in mind the race is at sea level, where this pace/heart-rate level will feel easier). As you can imagine, I'm very eager for Tuesday to get the question of my half-marathon race pace answered.

I also have a massage that day, after the run. I'm going to be spending a lot of time with my foam roller and in my bed over the next few days, too!

Nutrition

My weight is holding steady, but I know I'm in danger because I've reached a stage where I am hungry a lot of the time (even when I wake up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom or help one of my kids). Also, sugar cravings, which I thought I'd eliminated during my injury downtime, are back with a vengeance. So far I'm sticking with my "Sunday only" strategy for treats, but it's gotten hard.

Any advice on dealing with the hunger monster during marathon training? It's not like I'm going to be running fewer miles after Detroit!

Thank you to everyone for your nice comments on my last post. I'm off now to read some of the awesome race reports I'm sure folks have posted!

Book Review: Eat & Run

My head knows that running well and eating well go together. My heart would rather this weren't so.

Unfortunately my habits tend to follow my heart rather than my head.

This is why, despite a profound disinterest in cooking and meal planning, I'm attempting to embrace both. It's also why I picked up Scott Jurek's memoir. Jurek attributes his years of ultra-running dominance, in part, to his careful vegan diet. He's confident enough of the connection that there's a recipe at the end of every chapter of this book.

A plant-centered diet isn't totally foreign to me. Before I got pregnant with my twins in 2006, I had been a vegetarian for five years. Becoming one wasn't a hard transition for me. My husband, Dan, had been veg for a few years and easily converted me: I am an animal lover (and not someone who could ever hunt or in any other way imagine killing my own food), and I've never been a big fan of meat anyway. I resumed eating chicken and fish because I wasn't getting enough protein for the pregnancy and felt instantly better as soon as I added those things back. I think I grew my kids on scrambled eggs, in fact. After they were born, I never went back to vegetarianism, but someday I might.

Going vegan? More of a stretch. I love dairy. Ice cream is probably my single favorite food. And despite Jurek's assertion at the big book signing I attended the other week that ice cream made with almond or rice milk is just as tasty as the real thing, I am dubious.

This isn't to say that I doubt what he says about the benefits of a vegan diet are true. His running results, his clear good health, speak for themselves. He backs up his position with a lot of real science. Even my instincts tell me that he is right (and I think your instincts will, too, should you read this book). Moreover, the recipes sound tasty. I know I'd like all of them.

But as convincing as Jurek and the evidence are, I have no plans to go vegan. There are two big reasons why I don't have time for a diet like his, and won't have that kind of time for years, if ever:

1) Running (unfortunately but understandably) is not my job. The job I am lucky to have takes up 30 hours of my time each week in actual face time at work, plus another five hours factoring in my commute. That's 35 hours of waking time that I do not have to make rice milk from scratch, haunt the bulk aisles at Whole Foods, soak beans for hours, construct beautiful meals that are two hours in the making and chop endless quantities of vegetables these meals require--or plan for all of those things.

2) I have children. Outside of the hours required by my paid job, I am responsible for caring for them. This job is not limited to my waking hours. And it is even more unforgiving of the elaborate kitchen activities Jurek practices daily (including the aforementioned making of vegan milks from scratch, bulk shopping, bean soaking, vegetable chopping, multi-hour meals and planning). This is because the modern world provides many tempting shortcuts for busy parents trying to get meals on the table, especially parents like me who don't enjoy spending lots of time in the kitchen. In order to make time for running, reading, hanging out with my husband, blogging and having some fun with my kids, I frequently and unapologetically take many of those shortcuts.

Yes, I do try to make our meals as healthful as possible (and happily I have a husband who works harder on this than I do). Yes, I'm trying to do more planning and to avoid things that are processed. But I'm not above feeding the kids a box of Annie's boxed mac and cheese, and throwing chicken on the grill is much easier than hand-assembling lentil burgers.

Enough about me, though. You're probably wondering: what about the book? Isn't this supposed to be a book review?

The book is good. You learn a lot about the ultra-running psyche, which is endlessly fascinating. Jurek had a tough childhood, has been through a nasty divorce and endured years of sadness watching multiple sclerosis make his beloved mother sicker and sicker. Though he never says so explicitly, these are probably also big reasons he's so tough and gets so much out of painful activities like running through Death Valley. As with the Kenyans, whose hard lives contribute to their ability to run fast and far, Jurek's circumstances aren't easy to mimic (nor would most of us choose to mimic them, if we're honest with ourselves).

I came away from this book with a lot of respect for Scott Jurek. I'm glad it's a bestseller, too. It may well make many people's lives more healthy.

That said, I'm looking forward to the sequel. You know, the one he's going to write when he and his now-fiancee have kids. I have no doubt they'll solve the kitchen conundrum that I'm too lazy to deal with. Oh, and it's Sunday, my Sweets R OK Day. I'm going out for some Dairy Queen ice cream. The kind made from REAL milk.

My Next Food Challenge

June was a mixed month for me on the fuel front.

Here's what was good:

1. I successfully completed Run to the Finish's Green Smoothie Challenge. By "success," I don't mean "perfect." I missed two days while at the ALA conference (I tried to make smoothies without a blender two of the days and it just didn't taste good) and another couple after I came down with a UTI last week (the antibiotic I'm on is rendered less effective by milk and milk substitutes and anything fortified with calcium, so no dairy or almond milk or anything like that was allowed; these smoothies just don't taste as good with water--I'm very big on taste). But the vast majority of June saw me downing some greens this way, and I really came to like it. Once I'm finished with antibiotics, I'll get back to smoothies for breakfast.

I never could get Will (or Ruth or Dan) to try a green smoothie, but he liked to help with the blender.

I also won some Vega Energize from Run to the Finish. I'm impressed with Vega products. I know they're good for you....and they also taste good. Did I mention it has to taste good for me to deal with it at all?

2. I continued to avoid sugar except on Sundays. Avoiding sugar on this schedule has become a habit. I love it that I have to remind myself on Sunday that candy is OK. This way, I can have my cake (and M&Ms and chocolate chip cookies and Dairy Queen dip cones), and eat it too (not crave sugar constantly).


Here's what was not-so-good:

1. I went crazy with things like tortilla chips and Stacy's Pita Chips (the naked flavor; they're like crack). I wouldn't say this completely negated the good I'm doing avoiding sugar most of the time, but it partially negated it. My last three weigh-ins have been identical, at 130.8 (most recent one was this morning). In mid-May, I was solidly between 127 and 128. You might think three pounds isn't a big deal, but it is. I can see it in my upper arms, my belly and my thighs.

2. Meal planning went out the window. This is bad not just for my waistline and my running but also for my family's checking account. On the days I was at work, four days a week, I found myself at Alfalfa's, the organic grocery store across the street from my library, every day for lunch (and dinner on Tuesdays, when I work until 9 p.m.). One evening, I bought one of their prepared peanut-butter-and-jelly sandwiches. At check-out, when they rang me up, I found out they were charging $5 for that sandwich. That's when it came home to me that this meal-on-the-fly thing has to stop.

So my eating plan for July and onward is:
1. Plan meals in advance, concentrating at first on work meals. My eating on the days when I'm home with the kids is better (I don't have easy access to junk food at home, and I hate taking the kids to the store so impulse buying just doesn't happen). It's still sort of aimless, though. I'll tackle that once the work piece is a habit.
2. Stock up on my planned lunch and dinner staples at Alfalfa's on the first day of my work week, which is Sunday. This means apples, nuts, energy bars, bread for sandwiches and finger vegetables like baby carrots and cherry tomatoes. No pita chips, crackers or corn chips allowed. And after that shopping trip, I'm not allowed in there AT ALL until the following Sunday.
3. I also am not allowed in Starbucks or any other coffee shop. I spend far too much money on tea at places like this. Tea is really easy to make both at work and at home, and it's way cheaper.

So far this is going well. I spent money at Alfalfa's this week on Sunday only, ate the lunch I had on hand at work all three days I was there and have no receipts in my wallet from any coffee shop tea indulgences.

I'm hoping these changes will be enough to ease the burden on our checking account and get those three pounds back off. Ultimately, I'd like to see even lower numbers than 127, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. Rome, as the cliche goes, wasn't built in a day.

Scott Jurek and the Food Question

Cynthia and I had a great time at the Scott Jurek book-signing event last Thursday. She's so much fun to chat with, and once we arrived at the party we both knew other people and were each able to meet someone new. Meeting other runners, especially local ones, always helps me feel more connected. You can see pictures and get a good summary of the event at her post.

After Scott's talk was finished, I attempted to win a pair of shoes from his sponsor, Brooks. They invited volunteers up onto the stage, where we were put through a series of what Scott called proprioception tests. The first test? Merely lifting one of your legs and balancing on the other foot. I don't know if it's that my confidence has been shaken by this back thing, or if it was because I was wearing clogs, or if it was because I was up on stage with a pair of running shoes at stake and lots of eyes out in the audience--but whatever it was I failed immediately, put my leg down and was the first player disqualified. Oh well. Reminders to continue doggedly with my core work are always welcome (and if I'm ever on Jeopardy someday, I hope I do better than that)!

The book itself will be my next read. I'm really curious how I will feel about it, because there is a lot about food in it. Scott is well-known for his vegan eating style. He thinks it's what made him the runner and the man he is today.

As a former vegetarian myself, and as someone who struggles to eat healthily for the sake of my running and my girlish figure (ha!), I have no problem with those who choose to eat vegan, or those who emphasize protein or carbs, or any other style of eating. There are vegetarians in my family, others who are committed meat eaters, and there are others who have to watch carefully what they ingest because of blood pressure and other issues. To me, it's all good--and none of my business really.

The only time other people's eating styles bug me is when it's implied that I need to eat their way too, or there's going to be some dire consequence for my body and, sometimes, for my soul. When that happens, discussions of food can drive me up a wall. There are very few things in this world that I think are black-and-white--and food choice isn't on that select list. I think you can be a good and healthful person who chooses for whatever reason not to eat animal products....and I also think you can be a good and healthful person who DOES eat animal products.

I'm really curious how Scott will come across on this topic. From his presentation and our brief meeting with him when he signed our books, he seems like an open and nice person who thinks of others and contributes his time to charitable causes. But I'm still a little wary, because there are a lot of over-the-top eating-style zealots in Boulder, and there's far too much obsession with food choices. If there was as much attention paid here to, say, homelessness and solving our issues with that as there is to food choices, we would have much less of a problem with homelessness.

I put myself in this category, too. I think about food and body issues far too much. Really, in the great scheme of things, my eating is fine. I have enough money for food, I'm not overweight, underweight, or a frequent patron of fast-food joints, and I try to keep animal welfare in mind when I buy poultry and dairy products. I, too, should refocus the unnecessary attention I pay to food and drink on those with real troubles.

What do you think about the food thing? Do you think we rich types (and yes we are rich compared to the person holding a sign on the corner and/or using the local soup kitchen) obsess too much about food? Do you share my opinion that any eating style can be healthful and ethical?

New Challenges (Good Ones)

Last month, I had hoped to improve my sleep habits and even set up a little challenge to get myself there. Well, I outright failed that challenge, not only not improving my own sleep habits but also failing to help out the others who signed on to this with me (some of them did just fine without me--good for them!--and I apologize for being so little help).

This month will be different. I've set up some new challenges...and I hope not to fail at them.

1. The first challenge: to run again....for real....outside....before midnight on July 1. I believe I'm close. My back has been feeling (dare I say it?) good. I haven't had a pain-free day yet, but the pain I have has been much less. The Pilates exercises that I learned last week are the first that consistently make my back feel better immediately after I do them, and this effect seems to linger. I'm still VERY stiff when I wake up in the morning, but I'm trying to mitigate that with some yoga poses (child's pose and cat/cow) before I even climb out of bed. I've also eliminated the glute exercise that seemed to make things worse (the standing side leg swing) and am trying to hit only the ones that do no harm.

So fingers crossed!

2. The second challenge I signed up for is a formal one. Amanda at Run to the Finish has been leading a healthy challenge every month this year. I haven't been able to do the exercise-specific ones, but June's Green Smoothie Challenge is right up my alley.

Five days into June, I've found this surprisingly painless given how disorganized with eating I usually am. I acquired some greens-enhanced protein powder, a bag of pre-washed spinach, some bananas, some almond milk.....and that's all I've needed. The protein powder I'm using is called Vega One, and it's working for me because it tastes good and has all the needed nutrients but contains no artificial sweeteners. I tried a different brand on the first day and felt terrible; I discovered later that it contained both maltitol and xylitol, which work like laxatives. Sugar alcohols are the reason I can't drink Nuun before or during runs (it has another sugar alcohol, sorbitol).

This is a helpful challenge to me because I start off the day ahead of the game on getting enough vegetables into my diet. Throw in a glass of low-sodium V8 and/or a salad for lunch, and I'm truly good to go. For an indifferent cook (sometimes you could say I'm even hostile to cooking!), it's a lifesaver.

Tomorrow is National Running Day and I'm planning to celebrate with 30 minutes on the Alter-G, hopefully at 90% body weight. I'm glad to be able to celebrate at all! What are your plans for National Running Day?

Alter-G Part 2 & Other Updates

Yesterday was my second rehab session on the Alter-G anti-gravity treadmill.

I felt very lucky to be there at all, as 24 hours earlier I had been in the throes of a freak virus that sent my temperature up to 102.9 and made my head feel like some alien was trying to break through my skull. The sickness came on me at work Wednesday in the form of violent shivering and nausea. I managed to haul myself home and collapse in bed. At that point I thought there was no way I could make my 5:15 running date the next day.

But in the morning, after 14 hours of sleep interrupted only by a trip to the bathroom around midnight, I woke up with NO fever and only a slight headache that faded to nothing by noon. It was the briefest illness I think I remember having, if also one of the more intense. I took it easy in the morning, did a few of my physical therapy exercises in the afternoon, took Will and Ruth to the annual Art Show at their preschool and then Dan took over so I could make my appointment.

Fever aside, I was curious about how the session would go this time. My calves were SCREAMING on Tuesday and Wednesday after the first session. I think this was mostly a "Whoa, what is this running thing all about?" reaction (after all, they haven't had that kind of intensity asked of them for over two months), but my new Pure Flow shoes probably contributed too. I actually looked over old racing pictures of myself to make sure that, yes, I generally do have a mid- to forefoot strike. And I think I really do--even in the finish line pic of me in Houston last January (see the right-hand column), where I was doing what passes for sprinting for me at the end of a marathon, shows me landing neatly in the right place on my foot.

Yesterday's Alter-G session was apparently just what the doctor ordered for the calves. I wore the Pure Flows again, and while there's still some calf tightness, it's quite run-of-the-mill now, and fading--whereas on Tuesday and Wednesday they felt like I had just run a marathon on them.

And what about the back? My sacro-iliac support belt got in the way of the machine's calibration yesterday, so I did the run without it. My back's left side definitely bothered me more this time, but it wasn't alarming. In the end, I managed another good two miles of running, this time at 75% body weight (yay for the increase!). The exercise physiologist in charge this time was Patty, who will also likely be the person I'll go see about Pilates once Cathy (my physical therapist) thinks I'm strong enough for that. At the end, she loaded me up with a giant bag of ice for the back and on my way I went.

My back definitely hurt this morning, so I've been wearing the belt a lot today. But I did get my recumbent bike session in (I'll keep doing those until I can run a lot more than I'm allowed to right now), and I did a few stretches and some PT exercises afterwards. Things are definitely feeling more normal now.

My next Alter-G run is on Monday morning. This time I'm going to bring my Garmin to see how my heart rate looks at the various paces and percent body weights, and how that compares to what I'm used to seeing on the bike at this point.

Sleep Update: So this month was supposed to be the month where I got in the habit of getting eight hours a night on a regular basis. I even enlisted a handful of others to go along with me on it. Well, for me, it hasn't happened. The month's only half over, so I'm not giving up, but my bad habits in this area have proven much more deeply ingrained than I thought. I love sleep! So why is it so hard for me to get myself in bed when I should? Life's just too interesting, I guess.

Weight/Eating Update: At least I'm still doing well on this front! My weight this morning was 128.4, and I'm still going strong (stronger every day, in fact!) on having no processed sugar of any kind any day but Sunday. I've found not only am I no longer craving sugar during the week or wanting to graze from treat trays brought into work, but that when I do have my Sunday treat, I appreciate and enjoy it much more. Last Sunday, I rode my bike over to the Dairy Queen on Main Street and picked up a chocolate dip cone for myself and a plain vanilla one for Dan, then rode home where we enjoyed our little treat together. That cone tasted awesome! That might be what I have to do this Sunday too.....

Could I still eat better? Definitely! I've found myself dipping into the tortilla chips I buy for our Friday night taco dinners much more often than I should. I don't eat regular potato chips at all--but corn chips....they've got my number. So I feel like they might be the next thing I eliminate, or at least bracket into just one day of the week.

That's it for now! I'm thinking of my friends Cynthia and Kathy, both of whom have big races this weekend!

The Cleanse Report

Can't see nothin' in front of me
Can't see nothin' coming up behind
I make my way through this darkness
I can't feel nothing but this chain that binds me
Lost track of how far I've gone
How far I've gone

How high I've climbed
On my back's a sixty pound stone
On my shoulder a half mile line

--Bruce Springsteen

This morning I woke early, stepped outside to drive to the gym and ran smack into my favorite kind of weather. Chilly, cloudy, misty, still. A front was moving in, sweeping out the heat we've been experiencing for two weeks now (yesterday's high was 84, too hot for April Fool's Day, I'm sorry).


I wanted to run so badly.


But I put in 65 minutes on the recumbent and watched a glorious sunrise through the window from the bike. The golden disc of the sun slipped above the horizon, briefly shining in on me through the flower-covered tree branches outside. Then it just as quickly slipped under the cloud bank, leaving the eastern sky pink in its wake like a small dusk. The wind kicked up.


Now, on my lunch break, I still want to run. But I'm willing to be patient longer. I've been in my sacro-iliac support belt except for sleep and showers for four weeks now. I've been doing my exercises. Two days ago, I think I could actually feel that my transverse abdominis muscle is flexing more. My back still hurts in the morning and if I do too much bending or sitting. But I'm making progress.


Yes, I can be patient.


And now, because cleaning up the food act and not gaining weight is an important part of the physical therapy process too, here's a diet update.


The restrictive part of my cleanse ended Thursday and went well. For this part, I used the four-day "kick-start" that's part of the Prevention Flat Belly Diet plan (the book is just called Flat Belly Diet). I never do the full diet (no diet has ever worked long-term for me), but this "kick-start" is great because it's all four days of menus and snacks spelled out for you and it's all about busting cravings, eating clean (complex carbs, protein, fruits and vegetables) and eliminating possible allergens (wheat and dairy and soy). It's very similar to the way I like to eat leading up to a marathon so I don't have any poop issues during the race.


I do NOT adhere to their calorie restriction guidelines (roughly 1,200 a day for the four days)--I exercise too much for that, even at my cut-back level right now. What I DO use are the food suggestions for each meal and snack, and the "Sassy Water" recipe (stupid name, good stuff). If I'm hungry, I stick to the same foods, just eat more of them.


On Friday, I started eating normally again, and was pleased to note that my cravings for sweets and carbs were MUCH better than their frenzied level before the four days. True, on Saturday night, out to dinner with friends en route to The Hunger Games, I went nuts with chips and guac, a glass of wine and two super tasty fish tacos that left me feeling over-full for several hours afterward. But I went back to clean eating all day yesterday and skipped my Sunday treats. Saturday night's lapse must not have done too much damage, because I didn't miss the chocolate at all and still don't. Hopefully I can keep this going!


Meanwhile, I'm still taking the herbal supplements, a product by Renew Life called "First Cleanse." I take two in the morning that supposedly work on my liver, blood etc. and two in the evening that are supposed to help with elimination. They are reputedly pretty mild as these things go (I deliberately chose a product for newbies), and honestly I don't know if they are really doing anything. But they certainly aren't hurting, and if they're playing a role in the craving reduction, I'm all for them.


Tomorrow is my weekly weigh-in. I don't expect to have lost weight, but I don't think I've gained any either. As long as I can maintain my weight through this hiatus from running, I'll be one happy rehab patient.

Physical Therapy Ch. 4 and Eating Check-In

Today when I arrived at work around lunchtime (Tuesdays are my night shift), I discovered my awesome co-worker Lisa had left a handmade heating pillow for my back on my desk. I took it straight to the microwave and then sat with it for several minutes while catching up on email ahead of my 1 p.m. physical therapy appointment. Big THANK-YOU to Lisa!

Physical Therapy Ch. 4

Cathy went on vacation last week, so today I had my first of three visits with Sue, another therapist at Boulder Center for Sports Medicine. Cathy and Sue were the two therapists my doctor recommended back when I first went about my back, and after just a few minutes with Sue I felt I was in good hands.

Once again, when she checked it, she found my sacro-iliac joint had stayed in place. She also had me lie on my back and tested the strength of both sides by having me resist as she pushed each leg toward the table. The left is still weak, but things are improving (though, as I told her, I still can't get either leg off the ground during those knee lifts on the Swiss ball that Cathy prescribed last week). Then it was time for needling. Sue ranged a little higher in my back than Cathy had, and I can tell I will be a bit sore, which is good.

The only new thing she wants me to do is a dynamic hamstring stretch. Somehow my hamstrings are still really tight despite three weeks of no running. My main focus remains on strengthening the abs and the glutes with the exercises Cathy had given me. I will see Sue again in two weeks and am hoping to show her some real progress the next time we meet.

There were a couple of pieces of really good news. The first is that Sue said I can start to lengthen my aerobic sessions on the recumbent bike provided my pain doesn't worsen. She still wants me doing it only every other day ("I want the joint to get some real rest for now"), but on the ON days I can hammer a little harder and go longer.

The second good piece of news is that she thinks I can still plan on doing the Detroit Marathon in October. She offered no guarantees, but she said she is optimistic right now. Being superstitious, I'm still not going to add the "In Training" badge to this blog. But I'll admit....I'm feeling better about the fall.

Eating Check-In

Things are going well on the eating front. I weighed in this morning at 127.2, and none of my recent weigh-ins have been over 130. I've gone back to fewer-than-daily weigh-ins. The daily thing was driving me crazy. It swung wildly in a five-pound range (Corey had warned me about this--you were right, Corey), which on the "high" days made me feel bad all day. Silly, I know. But sometimes ignorance is bliss. And since the average looks good after three weeks of no running, I figure I'm doing OK enough to not police myself so rigorously.

My Lenten no-sugar-except-on-Sundays thing has also been successful. I credit it with the good weight maintenance so far. But I've not completely lost the craving for sugar. I took Will and Ruthie to a birthday party on Saturday last weekend, and, boy, did that Harry Potter themed vanilla cake look tasty. When Sunday's sweets-OK day arrived, I dove into a Dairy Queen dip cone (I had forgotten how good those things taste) AND a bag of pretzel M&Ms.

With two weeks to go until Easter, after which the spiritual imperative to self-sacrifice won't be there anymore but the physical need to restrain myself still will be, I think it's time I tried something else to get the cravings in line. So yesterday I began a "cleanse" that, as far as somewhat restricted eating goes, will last four days (I'm on day two) and as far as taking supplements goes will last two weeks (also on day two of that).

Now we're still talking about me, hater of diets, skeptic of plans that eliminate whole food groups (unless there's a case of true allergies), so "restricted eating" in my case means only that I'm trying to eat clean whole foods: no packages, heavy on the fruits and vegetables. It also means restricting my eating to set meal and snack times. It does NOT mean fasting, calorie counting, vegan or vegetarian, no-carb, no-fat, no-dairy or no-anything except refined sugar and fake stuff. I am trying to avoid white flours and cut back a bit on my pasta and bread consumption (I love these foods and easily eat too much of them, which I think does contribute to my sugar addiction), but I don't plan to do that forever.

The supplements I'm taking were recommended by Moutain Kait, from the brand Renew Life (I chose the "First Cleanse" product). I'm still not sure I believe all the claims about these supplements, but I'm willing to try them out for two weeks and see how I feel at the end.

How do I feel so far? Not bad! I noticed I didn't immediately want my morning green tea as soon as I woke up like I usually do, and I'm less gassy. I did get a huge headache last night right before bed, my stomach was actively growling around the same time. And today every time I stand up I get head rushes. But I have only two more hard-for-me days and I can up the consumption a little again (hopefully minus sugar cravings; I'd like to skip the Sunday treat this weekend).

And I'll need the calories for those longer recumbent sessions, right?

Checking In With the Ol' Scale

After running a marathon, I've found, I have a magical two-week window where my weight stays where it is despite the loss of miles during taper and recovery. Post-Houston Marathon in late January was no exception. I sat pretty at 127 pounds or so despite not really worrying about what I was eating (including birthday cake and celebratory meals out). At one point my weight even dipped into the 126-point-somethings, a place it hadn't gone even at the height of my mileage.

But now that lovely honeymoon is over.

My last couple of trips to the scale have registered numbers that range from 129 to 131. That's the wrong direction to be moving when I'm trying to get faster.

So it's time to get back on the Mario Lopez wagon: lean foods, meal planning, no sweets.

Yep, it's time.

It's also time for my annual Catholic girl ritual of giving up sweets for Lent, which begins next Wednesday. I've had good success with this most years, ending up leaner and with fewer cravings than when I began. And it's not a two-month-plus period of absolutely NO chocolate. The "rules" for Lent, which is a 40-day period of reflection and self-restraint before Easter, say that sacrifices made for the season don't apply on Sundays because Sundays are themselves mini Easters (and if you count, you'll find you can only hit the 40-day total by leaving the Sundays out). So it works out well for me--I eliminate most of the junk but still get a treat every Sunday.

Wish me luck! Despite the recent creep upwards, I'm starting at a weight that's almost 10 pounds lower than where I was at this time last year. Losing even two pounds should help me meet my speed goals for the spring.

Mario Bet Winner and a Couple of Blog Recommendations

There was a lot of great news from the New York Marathon today, including a new course record. Congratulations to all of you who ran, especially Carrie and Erin.

And unless my race-time stalking powers betray me, Mario Lopez ran a 4:23:31. That means Tricia of Running, Life, Etc. is our big winner. Her guess of 4:23:11 was uncannily close. By the way, I heartily recommend Tricia's blog. She is going to run her first marathon next year, and it will be really fun to read about her training as she heads for success. She's really good at keeping it real, too.

My friend Kathy suggested I post about my experience running NYC in 2005. Since it's such ancient history at this point, I'll just list a few highlights. I do think this is a race everyone who loves running marathons should do. It won't be your fastest time, but every step is memorable.

The highlights for me were:

• the fabulous summer and fall of training that led up to it, including running in Hawaii on our honeymoon, running in my first relay and running a 5K PR
• forgetting my bra and borrowing one the morning of the race (thank God it fit, and didn't chafe!)
• running on the top of the Verrazano-Narrows Bridge (yes, I got the top deck! almost as lucky as winning the lottery first try, which also happened)
• seeing my husband, in-laws and friend Wendy twice on the course (Wendy used her NYC savvy to get them around)
• sticking with a really great pacer woman to run what was a PR at the time (the other pacer for our level gave in to the high 70s temps and couldn't maintain it)

Heading toward Central Park with a few miles yet to go; I'm in the blousy orange shorts; no one wore running skirts back then as far as I know

• getting a sponge from the Sponge Bob people
• entering Central Park at last
• after the finish, telling the pacer that my next goal was to have a baby. Who knew we'd end up having *two* at once?
• eating an amazing meal wearing my medal at the Blue Water Grill with Dan, my wonderful in-laws (who traveled all the way from Pennsylvania to watch me run), Wendy and my other old friend, Jim

Dan and I celebrate with his mom and step-dad, Patrick, at the Blue Water Grill

• having a beer with Steve (who was soon to BQ) and another Peace Corps friend, Dan

Good times!

Thanks for suggesting this, Kathy. Kathy is a new blogger. She ran her first marathon in Portland last month and has two more planned (including Houston with me!) early next year. Read about her journey at got to keep on running long.

Newsflash! Mario Lopez Will Run NYC!

Did you know Mario Lopez, my nutrition guru, is also a marathoner? He's running the New York Marathon on Sunday!

Credit: Runner's World

According to a Universal Sports interview online, he has a time goal. Here's a quote:

You know, I'd like to go as close to four hours as possible. But my running partner is unfortunately at 4 and half. To be honest, because my running partner tore his hamstring I'm feeling bad and feeling guilty. I'm like, ‘Should I slow up for him until he gets better and he's in good shape too, or should I just leave him and just do my own deal?' I'm a little conflicted. But I know I'm definitely going to complete it.

That's right, dude. Blame the running partner!

Mario was profiled in Runner's World a few years back and claimed a half-marathon PR of 1:48. That's better than my half PR by eight minutes. But when he ran the Boston Marathon for charity in 2002, he clocked a 5:41:42. So I have beaten him at 26.2 by nearly two hours.

He blamed his girlfriend at the time for his Boston time, according to the same interview:

Well that one I ran with my girlfriend and she didn't want me to cross the finish line without her. I swear. Believe it or not, I'm in decent shape.

Classy.

So anyway, for a little fun for those of us not running NYC this weekend, I have a friendly wager with Raina over at Small Town Runner that I want to open up to everyone. I've got five virtual cents that says Mario finishes in 4:12. Raina (being a more generous soul) says 3:59:59. What's your guess?

Mario Lopez Eating Weeks 4 and 5

I'll share some happy news first.

Somehow, despite many and significant slip-ups in the last two weeks (described below), I weighed in this morning on three different scales as NOT SO MUCH WORSE than the last time I weighed in two weeks ago.

Home scale=128.4 (post-run, pre-breakfast) and 21.8% body fat (the body fat was actually down)
Gym scale=129.8 (post-breakfast); no BF measure, but Chris, my trainer, is going to do it again next week
Special weigh-in for our "Maintain, Don't Gain, Over the Holidays" team at work=129.6


I have this man to thank (or at least his ghost-writers and personal chefs) for the Extra Lean Family eating plan:

So now for the bad and the ugly.....

Here's what happened in Weeks 4 and 5 that caused a bit of a breakdown in the good habits:

• We got (oh, the horror) invited out to eat a couple of times by friends. Yeah, I know...first-world problem. But I've come to believe that restaurant food--more than any single food group, even sugar--is the devil when it comes to getting and staying lean. I do believe at some point that I will get better at not inhaling my entire plate of tasty tempting restaurant fare (in these cases, it was a brew pub twice and an organic grocery deli once)--but I am not there yet. So it's best for me just to avoid restaurants altogether. When someone invites your whole family out, though, what are you gonna do? Say no and look like a food prude? Fortunately, this doesn't happen very often.
• Halloween. Peanut butter cups.The work candy trough. And cold weather. Hot chocolate cravings. 'Nuff said.
• Insomnia. Yes, it's really true. The carb cravings came back after last Tuesday's bad night.
• Portion distortion. All the other stuff aside, I found myself going back for seconds more than I was in the first three weeks. Gotta stop that. I just like to eat. What can I say? I wish it weren't so fun for me.

Fortunately, much of this is over for a couple of weeks (until the temptations of Thanksgiving week and a couple of family birthdays arrive). And returning to good news, we have stuck by the basic tenets of the Mario plan (meals planned in advance, most of the shopping done in one fell swoop on the weekend) even amid all the slip-ups.

There's still something that's a mystery to me, but it probably always will be. Why do plateaus happen where they do? My weight history since my kids were conceived looks something like this:

April 2006: twins conceived; weight 125
June 2006: height of morning sickness; weight 125
August 2006: morning sickness a distant memory; appetite HUGE; weight 145
November 2006: appetite waning, but weight gain continuing; weight 170
Dec. 8, 2006: twins born; weight before C-section--175; weight after C-section--150
Dec. 8, 2007: twins one; weight around 145; yeah, that baby weight didn't come off despite a year of breastfeeding/pumping
Dec. 8, 2008: twins two; weight about 137; I started running again for real that year and did a half in the fall
Dec. 8, 2009: twins three; weight back above 140; less running, more eating; blame potty-training and bed-wetting? or my own lack of willpower?
Dec. 8, 2010: twins four; weight between 137 and 145; the plateau getting old; I had started running again and started my Boston quest
June 2011: weight 134; some pounds finally came off as I ramped up for another half
September 2011: weight 128; more pounds came off post-Top of Utah Marathon
Right now, Nov 1, 2011 (twins almost 5): weight 129; thanks Mario Lopez!

So it took me almost five years to get back to the vicinity of my pre-pregnancy weight. Much of that time was sitting in a huge plateau in the five-pound range between 137 and 142. Now I think I might be sitting in another plateau at around 129-ish.

Why do these plateaus occur where they do? Why was it so hard to break through 137, and yet when I did I lost nearly 10 pounds? What will it take to break through this one?

Don't get me wrong. I could be happy and healthy for the rest of my days at 128 or 129 pounds. But I feel that 120 would be better for my running. We'll have to see what happens with some returned fidelity to the Mario plan. Because of course we're going to stick with it. I like the results. My husband likes that it's actually inspiring me to cook. :^)

My Awesome Doc and Mario Week 2 Recap

As a city employee, I get good benefits. The best, I know as a wife and mom, is health insurance, but that's not as sexy (to me) as the free membership I get to the Boulder Recreation Center, home of my weight training and spin classes. One condition of this membership, though, is that I have to get my blood drawn every year for a cholesterol/glucose analysis as part of the City Wellness Program.

This meant a visit to my doctor at the Boulder Center for Sports Medicine this morning. My doctor is *great.* He effectively fixed my Morton's neuroma back in February, was super kind when I came down with a kidney infection in July after the ZOOMA Women's Half and he's been helping me try to get to the bottom (so to speak) of my tricky intestines.

He's also a badass runner. This morning I had the following conversation with him before the Wellness Program blood draw. Have you ever had a conversation like this with your doctor?

HIM: So your kidneys have been OK? No residual pain?
ME: Oh yeah. That was the other thing about my marathon. 15-minute PR, no pooping during the race, and no bladder infection! Yeah, they've been fine.
HIM: Great! You know, I ran Chicago on Sunday.
ME: Really?! How'd you do?
HIM: Well, I'm a master now, I'm 41, and there's good money at that race for masters, like $2,500, so I thought I'd go for it. And I was doing great, on a 2:30 pace. But it was hot and I just couldn't eat, and at mile 17 I just died. Those last nine miles were torture. I did pull out a 2:50 but I had to walk for about 15 minutes at one point.
ME: (trying not to let my mouth drop open at "2:30 pace" and "2:50") Yeah, that happened to me in my race too...except I DID eat. Makes me feel better that guys like you walk sometimes, too.
HIM: Yeah, it was my first marathon. I really want to do another one now and get it right. I guess I should do Boston, since I qualified.

I guess!! His first marathon! 2:50! And that was with a bonk! He told me he had four GUs in his pockets during the race and couldn't bring himself to touch them.

I'm so glad this guy is treating me, that there is a facility like this here. A couple weeks back, I was in there briefly and had the door opened for me by Frank Shorter. Ah Boulder.

Today is Tuesday, so that meant weighing in. Not such good news on the body fat front today....my home scale read 22.5%, and because I had to leave weights class early for the doc appointment, I didn't have a chance to get my trainer, Chris, to do a measurement with the calipers as I had planned. My weight, at least, was unchanged on the home scale at 128.4 pounds, and a little lower on the gym scale, at 128.2. I might have been a bit dehydrated, as I had to fast for the blood draw and had run 6 miles in the wee hours.

The second week of the Mario Lopez Extra Lean Family eating plan didn't go quite as smoothly as the first, though the planning, shopping and prep were once again fine. Part of the issue was it's "that time of the month" and at that time I'm always ravenous for things I shouldn't be eating--like second helpings of Mario's chicken enchiladas and other tasty things. I also caved and took the kids to a coffee shop once for their snack, which didn't harm me (I drank unsweetened green tea), but wasn't exactly easy on the pocketbook.

On the upside, we once again stayed out of restaurants entirely (two weeks of no eating out is a record, I think), and my fruit and vegetable consumption is way up. This week I'll do my best to keep the portions reasonable again, and my hands out of the snack trough at work. I'm still really liking the ease of this plan. I actually ordered Mario's book. It's a big deal for this cheap librarian to actually BUY a book, if that tells you anything.

Finally, I have MET my $500 goal for the Houston Marathon/Houston Food Bank's Run for Food Program. YOU FOLKS ROCK!! In fact, at $506, I'm now just $94 away from the $600 level at which I have promised to do a giveaway of some tasty and healthful Boulder goodies. Can you help me keep it going? If so, go to my fundraising page and donate! A big THANKS AGAIN to all of you who have already given. I'm so happy about this.

Recap of Mario Lopez Eating: Week 1

Sorry to frighten you with that picture, but I can't resist any reference to the 80s. Or I guess early 90s. I got a funny note from my sister-in-law, who's a California girl, talking about Mario's sleazy tomcat ways and how ironic it is that he's writing books for families. I'm not really surprised. But hey! I still like the book (and I'm using the library copy for now, so I haven't lined his pockets yet, though I probably will buy it).

Before I fill you in on the scintillating details of my family's first week on the Mario Lopez Extra Lean Family eating plan, let me put in another request for donations to my Run for Food/Houston Marathon fundraiser for the Houston Food Bank. Click here to donate.

OK! So...the week went well. I had gone on a mondo shoppning excursion Saturday night, stocking up with most of the things we would need for the entire week. This itself was a big change from the piecemeal grocery shopping we usually do, which is to say, Dan and I calling or emailing each other at about 4:30 p.m. with the "Any ideas for dinner?" question and then one of us beating a hasty path to the store ahead of picking up the kids. Having done the shopping was g-r-e-a-t. It made all the evenings so much less stressful. We did have to make one other trip on Thursday, to pick up some more fruit (my kids eat more fruit than Mario predicted--a good problem to have)...but I stayed out of the (expensive) organic grocery store across the street from my library all week.

The other great result: I brought all of my meals and snacks to work. I had all the kids' meals and snacks ready to go at home on the days I was with them (I can't tell you how many afternoons I've just taken them to a coffeeshop because I have nothing to give them--way too much expensive pumpkin bread consumed). And no dinners were left to chance. We didn't eat out once, any of us.

We are now geared up for Week 2. I went on this week's mondo shopping excursion last night, and this morning made a big pot of turkey chili for dinners tonight and Wednesday and some quinoa for a salad on Tuesday night (Sunday is Mario's prep day). Last night, the plan fell apart a bit as we went over to some friends' house for dinner, and I had FAR too many chips with guac, chips with bean dip and chicken enchiladas that were decidedly NOT extra lean, as well as too many of Mario's "lean" brownies (which were my contribution to the evening--and mmm, they were good). But we don't do that very often, so I figure if that's the worst I did, it will be OK.

Has my leanness (or lack thereof) been affected yet? Doubtful. I will check in with my bodyfat scale on Tuesday morning after my run and report back. Tuesday is scale day for me. I generally weigh myself both on my own at home (thus getting the bodyfat reading) and also on the one at the gym after weight training.

Regardless of what the scale says, trying this out has been great so far on a number of other fronts. I love having the meals planned, the healthy food we need bought, the guesswork removed, the restaurants and coffeeshops avoided, the spending on unnecessary grocery trips eliminated. I don't love shopping on Saturday nights, but really, since I'm at home with two sleeping kids most Saturdays anyway, it's not like I'm sacrificing great social alternatives.

Bring on more, Mario! Saved by the book!

Eating Update

I realized this morning after stepping on the scale that I hadn't posted a progress report on the nutrition aspect of my marathon training for a while.

Here are the high--and low--lights:

1) My weight has remained steady to a teensy bit lower. This morning it was 129.4 pounds, putting my BMI at a "normal" 20.3 (see chart here; I am 5' 7"). I'm glad I haven't gained any weight as I've been training (I know this can happen), but I'm also not much closer to my "racing weight" projected at 120 pounds than I was two months ago. Oh well. I'll focus more on that (and on whether or not it's realistic or healthy for me to try to get that low) for my Houston training cycle. I haven't weighed that little since high school.

2) I have a body fat feature on my scale. This morning it put me at 22.0%. According to one chart, this lands me in the "fitness" category. That sounds good, until you look one set up and see that there's also an "athlete" category for women with a range of 14-20%. "Athlete" sounds much more like "Boston Marathon qualifier" than "fitness" does (fitness makes me think of aerobics VHS tapes from the 80s). But losing 2 percentage points of fat may be as tough for me as getting down to 120 pounds.

I think there are two reasons I'm still sort of marshmallow-like despite my increasing miles: a) I stopped my weight training class three weeks ago (and before that missed a bunch due to my kidney infection and some kid-related issues) and b) I've fallen off the no-sugar bandwagon--not in a huge way--I've definitely been worse--but wine, pastries and chocolate have crept back into my diet.

Taking care of business on those two fronts, starting now for the sugar and starting after the Top of Utah Marathon for the strength training, may help with that body fat percentage.

3) I got the lab tests back for the blood draw my doctor ordered up in an effort to help me get to the root of my poop issues on some runs. These tests were all normal: no celiac disease, thyroid issues or anything else out of the ordinary. So now I'm waiting to hear back on some stool tests (sorry to be graphic!). I really don't expect those to be out of the ordinary either. I think I just have to be careful with dairy and nuts, and just generally eat really bland food, for about two days ahead of long runs.

Any other diet thoughts out there? Anyone else find the nutrition side of running so much less interesting (and therefore so much more difficult to get a handle on) than things like tempo runs, intervals and pace charts?

Racing Weight and Lent

This morning my shiny home scale/body fat monitor pegged me at 134.6 pounds and 23.4% body fat. Since I am about 5'7", this puts my body mass index (BMI) at 21.1.

The healthy body fat range for women is between 25% and 31%, according to a livestrong.com article quoting the American Council on Exercise. I was surprised to read that I'm *below* that range. As for the BMI figure, the CDC puts a normal range at between 18.5 and 24.9. I'm right in the middle of that.

So far so good: I'm healthy and fit. But here's the rub: the body fat range for athletes seeking to compete at "racing weight" (your best weight for best performance) is much lower. I learned this from a pair of wonderful books by Matt Fitzgerald called Racing Weight: How to Get Lean for Peak Performance (see cover above) and Racing Weight: Quick Start Guide. Specifically, for women in their 30s, the body fat range that usually indicates you're at racing weight is between 11% and 17%.

I sat down and did the math, using research-based formulas in the books, on what it would take for me to get to 17%. The result: I'd need to get down to 120.7 pounds. That's a loss of about 14 pounds of fat. A lot, in other words.

Fitzgerald notes that it does you no good to lose weight if you're losing mostly performance-enhancing muscle. In my case, that means being a weak 120 pounds probably won't give me marathon times that would be any better than they'd be at a strong 134 pounds. He's also quick to point out that it's unrealistic to expect that anyone can or should stay at their racing weight at all times. Rather, this weight should be a target atheletes seek to hit when they have a significant race coming up.

A significant race. Like a marathon where at the very least you want to hit a personal record. Like I have coming up on the not-as-far-away-as-I-think date of September 17.

SO. I am going to embark on the Racing Weight Quick Start plan. This involves taking a period of time between training cycles (which I have between the Boulder Spring Half on March 27 and the beginning of my marathon training in early June) to "jump start" fat loss. It's like going on a diet in that I'm pretty much going to have to cut out all junk food for eight weeks. But (and this is the happy part) it's NOT like a diet in that I get to eat around 2,000 calories a day since I'll continue to train intensely (remember, Bill Pierce suggests I use this time to "get comfortable" with 15-mile runs).

I don't expect to get all the way down to 120.7 pounds in eight weeks. It wouldn't be healthy to try for that anyway. But I can get a head start, form some decent habits that will take me through the summer's training and cross my fingers that my weight will get itself to where it needs to be by September.

This also jives neatly with the beginning of Lent. I was raised Catholic, and was a fairly committed Catholic until a few years back, when some of the Church's anti-women and anti-gay social stands finally got to me. Since last summer, I've happily attended an Episcopal Church and am raising our kids in that tradition. But a big part of my heart will always be Catholic.

Each Lent (Lent being the 40 days before Easter), I try to give up one bad habit and start one good one. This year the good one will be eating the Racing Weight way. As for the bad one, most years recently have involved giving up sweets. But this year I'm going to try something harder: giving up dining out. This is harder because it will require me to do some things so dull my good intentions with regard to them always fall by the wayside: plan my meals, make them at home, brown-bag it at work.

Having the marathon on the horizon and some helpful meal ideas from Racing Weight will help.

But really, no Chipotle for 40 days and 40 nights? Can I do that?

We'll soon find out: Ash Wednesday is this week. To help me stick with this plan, I'm going to use this blog as an occasional food diary. Food diaries are tedious, I know, so don't worry that I'm going to make this into a boring record of each crumb I consume. But forcing myself to note my meals and my fat-loss project here on a regular basis will help keep me on track, just as it's helped keep me going with my running this winter.

Food: Chapter 2

The scale in the weight room at the North Boulder Recreation Center is my old enemy. I began tracking my weight on it 3.5 years ago, beginning when I first signed up for a women's weight training class, and have been discouraged by it ever since.

But last Thursday and again this morning, discouragement morphed into something like hope. That's because on both days, this stern taskmaster of a scale registered my weight at below 136 pounds. That's a point that I have tried and failed since pregnancy to breach--despite the weight training class (which I've continued in some form without interruption since 2008) and training for two (now three) half-marathons and several shorter races over the same period of time.

To be exact, on Tuesday it read 134.6. Today it read 135. Since even I am not one to fret over a difference of .4, I'm going to call it a trend.

This backs up a highly subjective observation I've made recently that my jeans are starting to feel a tad bit loose. Thing is, I've felt that before and been dead wrong about the direction my weight is going. This is the first time both the scale and my pants have been saying the same happy thing.

What have I been doing differently? Not very much, but there are two things that may be contributing. One is that I have kept up with the gum chewing when I crave sweets, especially at work where sweets abound, a trick recommended by several sources including Martha, the nutritionist I was working with earlier this year. The second is that I have been emphasizing fruit consumption.

And by emphasizing fruit consumption, I mean that I've been downing a lot of fruit. I put it on my morning oatmeal. I eat it for snacks. If I get the munchies after dinner, I reach for a bag of frozen mango or frozen cherries and throw worries about serving size and calories to the wind. Because it's fruit, and it's so much better than the other junk I could be eating at that time that I figure extra is OK.

Hopefully all this fruit consumption makes up for the fact that I really don't eat as many vegetables as recommended. It's not that I don't like vegetables. Prepared well, they are delicious. But I'm lazy, so preparation isn't going to happen a lot of the time. Also, when it comes to food I'm easily bored, and I'm sorry to say there is little in the food world that I find more boring than, say, baby carrots, steamed broccoli or celery sticks. I *know* these things are good for me. But they do nothing to satisfy me either when I'm genuinely hungry or having a craving.

Fruit, however, is another story. I'm actually starting to crave that frozen mango now. My cereal is starting to seem naked without bananas and blueberries on it. I can actually now imagine a world where I might order fruit for dessert. And somehow it makes total sense that the way for a proven sweet addict to lose weight just might be to not try to eliminate all sweets but to find a healthier way to binge on them: by binging on fruit!

This also has given me a tiny glimmer of hope that perhaps I might learn to feel as happy about eating vegetables someday. But baby steps, one thing at a time, etc. If I can get the rest of the weight off without dieting, keeping a food diary or counting calories, I will be so happy.

Let's hope my body has decided that after nearly three years of warfare with the rec center scale, it's time to make friends.

The Food Post

I'm lucky that at the moment I have no dysfunctional relationships with people (unless you count the odd library patron here and there). I love my parents, siblings and in-laws. My husband is my best friend. I have lots of friends, including a fellow twin mom who gets up at 5:30 a.m. once every week to hike or spin with me, and a college roommate with whom I can pick it right back up where we left off even though we're thousands of miles apart now. I like my co-workers. I go to a great church.

But there is one dysfunctional relationship in my life. It's been there since puberty, with ups and downs. That is my relationship with food and, by extension, my own body. Somewhere along the line, I started to eat for more than just the ordinary pleasure of satisfying a biological and social need. I eat too fast. I eat too much. Food is my first thought when I become bored, anxious or celebratory. I crave sweets. I have trouble limiting eating to set, planned times of day.

The result? I have never been lean, and I haven't liked my body since I was ten years old.

Now before the protective watchers of body image chastise me, I will say that I know I am not fat. I have running to thank for that. Living sedentary is good for at least another 20 pounds on me, as I found out when my time in the Peace Corps ended with five weeks of limbo at a hotel in China where the only things to do were eat and watch pirated DVDs and wonder in a depressed fashion if the Russians were going to renew our visas (they did not). When I came home from that experience, I weighed somewhere around 150 pounds, the most I've ever weighed in my non-pregnant life. Starting to run again is what got me back to normal.

But my normal isn't good enough for Boston. A classic pear shape, I still carry too much fat in too many places (more places since I entered my late thirties and had my kids). I remember visiting a New York City gynecologist, who weighed me at the beginning of the appointment and, with raised eyebrows, asked "Where do you put it all?" and then once the clothes came off, said, "Oh, you have heavy hips and thighs." When I first met my husband's ultimate frisbee friends, one of them told me how great it was that Dan had chosen a "normal-sized girlfriend" this time (his prior girlfriend was a size 2 or so, with the kind of colt-like legs I have always envied; I did not take being "normal-sized" in this context as a compliment and remember trying not to sound sour when I thanked her).

At five feet six-and-a-half inches and around 137 pounds, I'm still carrying 10 pounds of baby weight and have an out-of-control sweet tooth. When I ran NYC five years ago, I hovered between 125 and 130 pounds. To qualify for Boston, it's safe to say I need to be 10 pounds below that.

This is the scariest part of my Boston quest for me. When it comes to food, I'm like St. Augustine: "Lord, help me to be good...but not yet." My hope is that it's possible not to entirely give up the occasional piece of pumpkin pie, the odd ice cream cone, pieces here and there of good French bread and still get to the weight I need to be. But my fear is that that is not possible, not for me, and that I will have to cut out all of that stuff entirely, because I can't have just a little--I'm an all or nuthin' kinda gal when it comes to food indulgences.

This morning, I met with Martha, a dietician working with the Boulder Rec Centers where I get a free membership thanks to my job at the library. I was armed with a three-day food diary (full of indulgences) and stats about my cholesterol, blood pressure and blood sugar (all good). I had also told her in advance about my Boston goal.

I was with her for more than an hour. She was upbeat, recommending two books by Nancy Clark (her general sports nutrition book and her food guide for marathoners). I will definitely get these through the library and, if they are working for me, will buy them. Martha also said that I don't need to diet given the amount that I exercise, but she feels that small tweaks amounting to 250 calories less a day will help me gradually get my weight down. Such tweaks, she thought, could include less guacamole when I get a Chipotle burrito; higher fiber cereals at breakfast (Wheat Chex and Cheerios don't have enough fiber; I was surprised!); and a smaller sized latte. She also wants me to have a little protein with every meal and snack. I'm also going to practice better meal planning, especially for my lunches and snacks at work and dinners.

We're going to attack my cravings and sweet tooth issue at our next meeting, on Dec. 7 (after the Colder Bolder). For now, she thinks I should try the out-of-sight out-of-mind strategy with things like my kids' Halloween candy. I will do my best!

Changing my diet, I know, will be hard and slow. But it's important. It's a sub-goal that has a finish line and a ticket to Logan Airport attached to it.